Passion evokes a lot of different things for different people. Sometimes our passions, while delightful, don’t always get us what is needed to live a happy and productive life. Craig Gonzales, today’s guest blogger and “very happy man in a great relationship and kind of over-the-top with it all” has devised a way to be true to his passions, AND to get what he needs. If you follow his advice in this very honest post you might even enable some passion of your own!
The thing is, there is constant talk about following passion vs being practical. With some very loud people claiming that passion is the only way to go. Others, like Cal Newport, say that passion is overrated. The world doesn’t care about your passion.
Follow your passions. No one cares about your passions. Be proactive about what you love or you will be called a phony. People only care about themselves. I think this website is something special on the internet. You are full of life, and love, and moxie. And I dig on that. So respect my push towards aligning my passions with my lifestyle.
Let me list my “passions” so we can explore how living my life can achieve them:
- Mind blowing sex
- Feeling attractive and being looked at
- The fear you get before doing something really stupid
Having those five things constantly is a bit overbearing and unrealistic. Not unrealistic in that I won’t be able to do it, but unrealistic because other things in life matter. Sure, I love tequila, but I won’t drink it every day. Sure, I love mind blowing sex, but a man has to work. It’s one of those times where people say, “Have your cake and eat it, too”, which I have always found utterly retarded. Why would you buy/make a cake if you did not plan on eating it? I prefer the slightly sexist Italian saying, “I want to have a full bottle of wine and a drunk wife” as my life mantra. I do want to feel attractive and get a six-pack, that is a passion of mine. Being special. But, in order to do that, I need to have the time and the money to go to the gym, eat well, and measure my body fat percentage. So how do we get the time to rock our passions?
Passion is as much a feeling as it is an action as it is an event as it is a way of life. But my life cannot be spent on a tequila-fueled sex-bender, as completely and utterly awesome as that sounds, because I have bigger fish to fry. I have moxie, and I have responsibility, and I have desires for success, and wealth, and health, and travel. So, in order to align my passions with my responsibilities and my burning desires (I am not passionate about money, but I really, really, really want a lot of it.)
I have a few rules I live my life by, as I am sure you have a few rules you live your life by. They are not my passions, they are passion-enablers. You should come up with your own. Your own small wins. Daily victories because life is a game of inches. These five rules keep me focused on my bigger dreams, my passions, my ability to live my passion, my ability to take my small business and focus on things that need to be focused on. I don’t care about me when I am working (which is why this article has so many I’s and Me’s… my business has enabled me to be passionate about talking about my passion. Hah!)
Rule #1: No shoes indoors.
Rule #2: Barefoot as often as possible.
Rule #3: At least one orgasm per day, somehow.
Rule #4: I am allowed inside my head as many hours per day as I like
My life is not spent drinking tequila. My life is spent building a business, laughing with friends, making a family, and being productive. Because your passion and your work do not have to be either mutually exclusive or one and the same. People love what they are good at. it takes time to get good at things. People get passionate about success.
Which leads me to rule #5.
Rule #5: Have patience
It’s really important to have patience when working towards your passion.
But the market, the people, the others, they don’t care about your passion. And that’s not a bad thing. You should live your passion. But if you want to make a side business, if you want to write a blog, if you want to be seen as an authority or as someone who is to be respected. Then, well, then you need to focus on the passion of others. If you can identify and push forth your passion enablers, you will build a life around your passions. I want to drink tequila, preferably while rocking a six pack from a beach with a beautiful woman. After the tequila party, I’d like to go surfing, or fishing, or sky diving, or shark hunting. And I’d like my life to be all about those amazing experiences. But to get that, I need the time and I need the money. If you really want to have fun in your life, you need to get everything else organized. My passion-enablers give me the small wins and the small motivation each day to realize my goals.
For example, I run an online tutoring company. I write for children and parents. Children couldn’t not care less about my passion. Parents care about one thing: their children. So, their passion is children, my passion is sex and fun. If I want parents to respect me, which in turn leads them to trust me, which in turn leads them to work with me, which in turn lets me help their children achieve academic excellence, what do I write about? Sex and money? Or making children smarter?
You got it.
But, does that make me a phony? No! Not at all. I love education. You should never do something you do not love. But it’s not my passion and your work does not have to be your passion. If you love hockey but are a great programmer, be a programmer and play hockey. Making people smile, that makes me happy. I happen to be good at the school thing. So, why spend my life trying to just make money and have sex when i could easily (easily) do the education thing to help people, which brings the money and the sex.
See? Having passions is perfect, but you do not have to work your passion (unless you are perfectly lucky) so long as your passion enablers keep you moving forward towards what you really want in life. Each night I spend about 1 hour inside my head, dreaming about the future, dreaming about the past, and dreaming about what I should do right now to make my future awesome. That is rule #4. I’m allowed to do that.
What do you do to enable your passions? Do you love things, but never have the time? Do you want to do something, but don’t have the time or the money? Why not? What’s stopping you?
Craig is an American entrepreneur running a successful education company. He writes about business development and fun and provides small-level consulting for small businesses. You can find him at I Bring the Fun and on twitter @Craiggonzales.
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