Kicking Romance week off with a little wedding… mine!

Today is my Fifth Wedding Anniversary so I’m sure you will not mind if I kick Romance Week off a little early with a little wedding remembrance… Rob and I wrote our own vows and  eloped, so our marriage was a private event but I thought it might be fun to share our day with you as we remember it ourselves….

THE CEREMONY

Aloha, Aloha ka kou (greetings to all) It is an honor and privilege to be with you on this special day of Joy and love. For out of your Love for each other, you have come together here in Maui to be joined in Marriage.

Let us take a moment to be aware of all the beauty around us, taking in a breath of air, and listen to the sounds of nature, as the waves come up on the shore and the gentle breeze caress our face,

We are gathered here today to join you Rob and you Kathy into Marriage.

 

Marriage is more than a contract. It is a commitment to take your joy deeper than happiness, deeper into the discovery of who you really are. It is a journey — to a life of becoming. Marriage is even deeper than commitment. It is a covenant that says: I love you. I trust you. I will be here for you when you are hurting, and when I am hurting, I will not leave. Marriage is intended to provide a sanctuary safe enough to risk fully loving, with nothing held back. Expect that best from your lover and you can transform your home into a castle where love thrives.

Rob and Kathy have not come here today to exchange a sacred vow. They have come here in an act of their love for each other; to give action to their truth; to declare their choice to live and partner and grow together – out loud and in the presence of others, out of their desire to make a public declaration of their choice, and thus make it even more powerful.

LEI EXCHANGE:

In Hawaii we exchange Leis as a symbol of our love. The beautiful crafted lei with all its hand picked flowers and twine, carefully bonded together with love, is a reflection of your love and Aloha that you share for one another. As you exchange these leis you will begin to weave your lei in life with love thru out eternity. May the exchange of these lei’s Be the new beginning of your lives together and now we ask for the blessings of life so we may open our hearts to the ways of love And now, with loving Aloha, please present your leis to one another with a smile and a kiss upon each others cheek.

We’ll begin by asking the question: Why get married?

Rob and Kathy have answered this question for themselves, and I want to ask them this so they can be sure of their answer, certain of their understanding, and firm in their commitment to the truth they share.

Now Kathy and Rob, affirm it is your understanding that you are not entering into this marriage for reasons of security . . . . . . that the only real security is not in owning or possessing, nor in being owned or possessed . . . . . . not in demanding or expecting, and not even in hoping that what you think you need in life will be supplied by the other . . . . .but rather, in knowing that everything you need in life . . . . all the love, all the wisdom, all the insight, all the power, all the knowledge, all the understanding, all the nurturing, all the compassion, and all the strength . . . resides within you . . . . and that you are not marrying the other in hopes of getting these things, but in hopes of giving these gifts, that the other might have them in even greater abundance.

Is that your firm understanding tonight?

(Kathy and Rob, say, “It is.”)

And Kathy and Rob, you are declaring you are not entering into this marriage as a means of in any way limiting, controlling, hindering, or restricting each other from any true expression and honest celebration of that which is the highest and best within you – including your love of God, your love of life, your love of people, your love of creativity, your love of work, or any aspect of your being which genuinely represents you, and brings you joy. Is that still your firm understanding tonight?

(Rob and Kathy say, “It is.”)

Finally, Kathy and Rob, you are choosing to not see marriage as producing obligations but rather as providing opportunities . . .. . . opportunities for growth, for full Self-expression, for lifting your lives to their highest potential, for healing every false thought or small idea you ever had about yourself, and for ultimate reunion with God through the communion of your two souls . . . . . . that this is truly a Holy Communion . . . a journey through life with one you love as an equal partner, sharing equally both the authority and the responsibilities inherent in any partnership, bearing equally what burdens there be, basking equally in the glories.

Is that the vision you wish to enter into now?

(Kathy and Rob say, “It is.”)

What symbols do you bring as a reminder of the promises

given and received today?

(Rob and Kathy each give their rings to the minister, who holds them in his hand as he says . . .)

These rings are a circle, which symbolizes eternity—for a circle has no ending. Let this ring remind you of the new relationship that you are entering into with each other, which you desire to last for a lifetime.

In this moment, Kathy and Rob choose for it to also be a symbol of unity, but not of possession, of joining, but not of restricting; of encirclement, but not of entrapment. For love cannot be possessed , nor can it be restricted. And the soul can never be entrapped.

Now Rob and Kathy, please take these rings you wish to give, one to the other.

(They take each other’s rings.)

VOWS:

Rob, please repeat after me.

I, Rob . . . ask you, Kathy . . . to be my partner, my lover, my friend, and my wife . . . I declare my intention to give you my deepest friendship and love . . . not only when your moments are high . . . but when they are low . . . not only when you remember clearly Who You Are . . . but when you forget . . . not only when you are acting with love . . . but when you are not . . . I further declare before God and those here present . . . that I will seek always . . . that we make each other and our relationship . . . the priority in our lives.

I resolve to adore you for who you are, . . . to create a rich, delicious life and partnership together, . . . . sharing all that is good within us . . . with all those whose lives we touch.

(The minister turns to Kathy.)

Kathy, do you choose to grant Rob’s request that you be his wife?

(She answers, “I do.”)

Now Kathy, please repeat after me.

I, Kathy . . . ask you, Rob . . . to be my partner, my lover, my friend, and my husband . . . I declare my intention to give you my deepest friendship and love . . . not only when your moments are high . . . but when they are low . . . not only when you remember clearly Who You Are . . . but when you forget . . . not only when you are acting with love . . . but when you are not . . . I further declare before God and those here present . . . that I will seek always . . . that we make each other and our relationship . . . the priority in our lives.

I resolve to adore you for who you are, . . . to create a rich, delicious life and partnership together, . . . . sharing all that is good within us . . . with all those whose lives we touch.

(Minister turns to Rob.)

Rob, do you choose to grant Kathy’s request that you be her

husband?

(He answers, “I do.”)

RING EXCHANGE:

Please then, both of you, take hold of the rings you would give

Each other, and repeat after me:

With this ring . . . I thee wed . . . I take now the ring you give to me . . .

(they place the rings on each other’s hands)

. . . that all may see and know . . . of my love for you.

(The minister closes . . .)

We recognize with full awareness that only a couple can administer the sacrament of marriage to each other, and only a couple can sanctify it. Neither a church, nor any power vested in me by the

State, can grant me the authority to declare what only two hearts can declare, and what only two souls can make real. And so now, in as much as you, Kathy, and you, Rob, have announced the truths that are already written in your hearts here in our presence and before the One Living Spirit – we observe joyfully that you have declared yourself to be . . . husband and wife.

Let us join now in prayer.

Spirit of Love and Life: out of this whole world, two souls have found each other. Their destinies shall now be woven into one design, and their perils and their joys shall not be known apart.

Rob and Kathy, may your home be a place of happiness for all who enter it; a place where the old and the young are renewed in each other’s company, a place for growing and a place for sharing, a place for music and a place for laughter, a place for prayer and a place for love.

May those who are nearest to you be constantly enriched by the beauty and the bounty of your love for one another, may your work be a joy of your life that serves the world, and may your days be good and long upon the Earth

-Amen

 

Thank you so much for sharing my wedding!

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10 thoughts on “Kicking Romance week off with a little wedding… mine!

  1. Thank you so much for sharing the details of your beautiful wedding, Kathy. And happy anniversary to you – I wish you another year of love and “bliss” – with many more to come!

  2. Lisa says:

    Kathy! This – and both of you – are absolutely beautiful! I’ve seen a few of those before, but the photos are stunning. I hope that you are having a deliciously wonderful anniversary!!!

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